A Movement : Ruminations

July 5, 2020

Emily Gbadamosi

Action That Will Make or Break

Courage. Resistance. Revolution.

Frustration. Fear. Doubt.

This is what I have been ruminating on over the past month. It is not all black or white, or Black and White.

I took a month away from Instagram. After the deaths of George Floyd, Breonna Taylor, Ahmaud Arbery, Rayshard Brooks, the most recent in a long list, my timeline and story feed were filled with calls of arresting officers, protesting police, investigative white privilege. But that slowly came to a standstill; after a few weeks of these messages, feeds returned to “normal” – stories showed backyard BBQ’s, cocktails by the pool, and hikes along the coast. Finding myself taken aback by the performative activism of my peers and disillusioned with how the media was portraying the atrocities committed by our police, I decided I needed to immerse myself in the literature, conversations with fellow educators, family and friends. My time away was for myriad reasons, namely that I needed that time unhindered by outside and undue influence, to interrogate and investigate the movements facing our world right now, my place in it, the historical and social implications, and where we go from here.

Emily Woodall Self Portrait

Being uncomfortable is a condition of our humanity.

When we are uncomfortable we are growing.

This time has taught me a few things:

  • My family is the most important thing to me. I could not be more thankful for the time we have spent together and the learning and unlearning we are doing together.
  • Antiracist is not a noun it is a verb – it is the daily, hourly, moment by moment actions we take to dismantle systems of oppression, and uplift voices of courage, resistance and revolutionary change.
  • One book, article, podcast or re-post does not exonerate us from our racism. We have been socialized in this culture of oppression and it is our duty to dismantle it from the inside out.
  • Understanding implicit bias is one piece of the puzzle, understanding how we came to those biases is an equally important piece.
  • Being uncomfortable is a condition of our humanity. Being uncomfortable is not the same as being in pain, being uncomfortable will not kill you, but make you stronger. When we are uncomfortable we are growing.
  • Frustration, anxiety, grief, shame, fear and doubt are all natural feelings to have over what is happening in our world – it is what we do with those feelings, how we channel them into action that will make or break this movement.
  • Calling out our friends, family, colleagues or strangers is not an act of frustration or distrust, but rather an act of love and compassion. Instead of focusing on the hate, focus on the humanity and call each other into community. We can do much more with love than we ever can with hate.
  • We have to keep living and finding joy. Our activism will not continue if we do not actively seek out joy amidst the pain, actively seek out hope amidst the grief, actively seek out love amidst the sorrow. Our humanity depends on us holding space for both. It’s not all black or white.

In that spirit, I will continue to share more thoughts on activism, education & joy. I hope you will join me. Follow along on Instagram @emilywoodallphoto for daily reminders that antiracism is a verb. 

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